Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Life's a dance you learn as you go...

It is amazing how quickly life changes! “Life’s a dance you learn as go.” I am back in the single world and truthfully, I couldn’t be happier. I feel like once somebody shows you their true colors, you have to believe them. I always give people the benefit of the doubt…but there are no three strikes and you are out with this girl. It is one mess up and you are done! Life it too short to dwell on things so, I have learned to just let go and know that when one door closes, another one opens. I am not going into detail on why I am single but I will tell you…some guys are idiots. Or maybe I should say, make idiotic choices or how about both ;)? I on the other hand, feel empowered and it really helps me realize how strong of a person I have become. Life is definitely too short to settle and I am using this time to focus on myself. I have to be able to stand on my own two feet independently, before I can be swept off of them. I let one guy break me in the past and I had to put back together the pieces but I think without that experience I wouldn’t be the person that I am today. I have also discovered that if a guy always knows what to say at the right moment…he is not genuine because genuine guys do not have that capability because well, no offense...but they are guys. Or if you have a conversation with somebody about insanity and they explain to you that the definition of it is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results… apparently, people do not choose to listen to their own advice, but who am I to judge? I am excited for what the next chapter of my life has in store for me…just because somebody is not on the same road as you, doesn’t mean they are lost…some people just like to pave their own way ;) It just so happens that I am one of those people.   

Friday, February 4, 2011

Finally Friday = )

I am always sooo excited when the weekend comes...I am not sure if that is a good or bad thing. My goal is to someday have a job that when Monday comes I am excited to go to work! I think that is why I am so strong willed about not settling. I am happy I have some followers now :) I promise my blog will get more interesting as time goes on..I am just getting into the swing of things. I am going to take a trip to the otherside of the mountains to clear my head and visit one of my bestfriends and my hope is to come back on Monday refreshed and get my life in order. Hope you all have a fabulous weekend!

This song makes me happy =)

I love this quote...

"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of someone else's life with perfection."

- from The Bhagavad Gita according to Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat, Pray, Love

Thursday, February 3, 2011

"My Quarterlife Crisis"

Today I realized something about myself...I am going through a quarter-life crisis...I suppose the first step is admitting you have a problem...so how am I going to conquer this you might ask? First and foremost I am going to follow my heart, second I am going to take care of myself and do what makes me happy, and finally I am going to keep a positive outlook on my life...because it can only get better from here = ) Not to mention I still have a lot of milestones to reach.

"Quarter-life Crisis"
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like.
You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.
What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.
You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.
You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.
You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life; You feel alone and scared and confused; Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better; All this while you had been convincing yourself that you didn't want to be tied down to any person; Now suddenly you have moments of self-doubt when you wonder if you waited too long and let someone special get away. You love someone but maybe love someone else too, and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person! Random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic;
You want to be independent but suddenly, the idea of having the stability of a special someone to trust and lean on doesn't seem all that bad. You want to be your own person and yet be taken care of at the same time.
You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.
You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender.
We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.
I am not sure who wrote this but I can definitely relate to it...I look forward to my future, I want to be done paying my dues, and catch some sort of break...but don't we all?
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Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Self-less or Profit?? That is the question...Can't I have both?

Soooo... here it is midnight and my mind is going a million miles per hour so sleep is proving to be difficult. My hope is that getting some of this out on paper will help me sleep. The man which I will refer to as the loml is constantly on my mind. I am naturally a happy person and I was pretty content with life but now that he is a part of it my life is so much more beautiful. I honestly feel like there was a piece of me missing and now I am complete...it is kind of scary to say that but I feel that is what real or dare I say true love is about. He makes me want to be a better person and I am not going to lie...I am a pretty great person as is but I am striving to be better. We both share this passion for life that I feel a lot of people are lacking and every moment that we spend together we never take for granted. The other day he made me promise that I will never become complacent and I love that about him = ) I need more out of this life and it is a constant struggle because working at non-profit organizations is rewarding and I love that it is self-less but it does not pay the bills! I am so ready to be able to stand on my own two feet and be independent but I think I am going to have pick a different job for now…Which stresses me out to no end because job searching is a difficult task and I am not a fan of rejection. I know I need to find a new job because I am stuck in a rut…I am thankful to have a job but I feel like I am worth so much more and I am not even putting my best effort in my job anymore because some of the work I just don’t feel I should have to do. I know that is not the best attitude but I am ready for more…I am ready to spread my wings. So here is hoping I find a new job soon …

Monday, January 31, 2011

Hello there = )

I suppose first I should say Hello and Welcome to my blog : ) I created this on a whim which is pretty typical. I am not the best writer and I am not going to focus on grammar so if that is what you are searching for…you are at the wrong spot ;) I have been feeling a little under the weather lately and I know that is because of the weather. I miss seasons! While I was in college there was fall, winter, spring, and summer…on this side of the mountain we get rain! Don’t get me wrong rain can be refreshing but sunshine makes me happy! Trust me…happy me is much better than grumpy gills me ;) I am currently in a transition period…I graduated from college, I am gaining the experience that I need to get a job that I want, and I am living with my parent’s. Trying to stay optimistic in this position is a lot easier said than done but I am doing my best! I just turned 25 and I am hopeful that this will be a great year…so here is hoping! Another fun fact about me is that I am in love with a guy who lives 2,000 miles away…but what is distance? If you love somebody and they are in your heart I believe you are already there. I have never been much of a romantic until this special somebody came into my life and I am truly thankful for that : ) Although, my family is not because he is in the military…heaven forbid somebody fight for something that is bigger than themselves so we can enjoy our freedom. I love my family and I know that they mean well but I need them to trust me…I am a smart girl and I definitely have always thought with my head and my heart. Although, as I get older I am more inclined to think with my heart because I have discovered that life is short and we never really know how much time we have left. Therefore, I am going to do what makes me happy and live my life the way I want to and believe that I am meant to! When trying to come up with a name for this blog I struggled but I decided to call it inspiration. I am constantly inspired by quotes, music, people etc. and I felt that was a fitting name for my blog. I am new to this whole blogging thing so I know that this blog is totally random…but as am I ;) <3 Here are some quotes that I love…
“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” ~Judy Garland
“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”
~Swedish Proverb

“If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise.” ~Robert Fritz
“When something is missing in your life, it usually turns out to be someone.” ~Robert Brault